After discovering how hilarious rubber chickens were in Mad Magazine, which I loved, I not only had to have one, I also covered my school books and notebooks with pencil likenessnes – covered pages with nothing but strung-up rubba chiks.
Now, granted, I was eight years old, but I still enjoy gazing at the lovely Rubba Chik visage and stringy body of rubberiness. Great fun still.
Am noting a theme here -many of nearly identical likenesses is what I like best.
Repitition equals “Good”.
Not much room for variation, and this is where I can run into conflict; the world and its contents are fluid and ever changing and the autistic “insistence on sameness” is trouble in a changeable and morphing environment.
Autistics are not known for flexiblity but I have developed a modicum thanks to the study and practice of Buddhism, and it really helps, especially during a panic-y “meltdown”, which is often precipitated by some change, especially something unexpected.
Last week I started attending a Tibetan class in Lu Jong (kind of like Tai Chi but more lively and with mudras- hand movements which made me laugh because some of the Buddhist body movements look a lot like stimming). The exercise was followed by meditation, which, although I am skilled, I rarely meditate by myself.
I told them I have some “over sensitivities” and may need help mirroring the movements, which they did and told me they hope I return as I have, “good energy”.
So on Tuesdays I will be doing Lu Jong and meditation for my sensory diet.
I am the type who does well with heavy exercise-usually.
However, I have tried Yin yoga which is long, slow poses, and found it calming. I am not drawn to long, slow anything but, as ‘they’ say, sometimes it is what one is NOT attracted to which may be what one most needs.
Most difficult for me, though, is doing what is needed to calm myself or feel better, such as wearing noise cancelling headphones when it is too loud out there. I find myself knowing what I need to do but not doing it. Like meditation: I am well aware it helps promote an overall eveness of calm abiding, yet I don’t do it as often as I would like.
Since attending Autistry, I think I am getting better at “self regulation”, or at least recognizing it as something I am not very good at and can improve.
Though I did lose it over my stolen phone, crying and flapping right there in the parking lot, I was able to calm myself finally by reminding myself over and over that it will be OK and I had done all I could to report the incident and- look on the bright side- now can get the phone I really like – the ZTE Z Max Pro.